A deafening scream filled the air. It wasn't mine. And once again everything happened so quickly. I felt the metal rush towards my stomach, but a huge force ripped me off the ground. I landed painfully on the hardwood. The air was forced from my lungs as I rolled onto my back. Black dots danced at the edge of my vision and it was like I was underwater again. But this time, it didn't feel good. Slowly noises reached me and my head became clearer again.

The first thing I realized was that I wasn't dead. Damned. I must have lost the knife when I fell. A large weight pressed me to the ground again and I struggled to breathe. It wasn't until a few seconds later that I realized Cassian was crouched on my stomach, holding my hands on the wood in an iron grip. He held me captive and pinned me to the ground. Holy shit.

His breathing was far too rapid for a supernatural creature with great endurance. His curls finally fell tangled over his forehead and almost tickled my nose. His head hovered above me and his eyes sought my gaze, but I was still far too dazed. The impact had caused a lot of trouble for my already bruised head.

So Cassian had thrown me to the ground before I could finish. I groaned. I couldn't even do that in peace.

My eyes finally decided to focus on my counterpart and my gaze met his. What I saw in his eyes almost took my breath away. He looked completely exhausted. Pure terror was written on his face as he just looked down at me in disbelief. Something glittered in his eyes, but I could hardly see it because an incomprehensible pain suddenly shot through me.

"Why?" he said breathlessly, but I barely listened.

“WHY?” he now shouted at me. Why did he even care? He didn't even know me. Wasn't it better for him if I did it for him? Couldn't he just let me go? I wanted to hide in a dark corner and let the darkness that threatened to engulf me again finally drag me away.

I felt the weight on my chest go away, but a pain radiating from my right thigh hit me. I blinked. Cassains was off me but was now kneeling next to me. I looked at my thigh and couldn't help but laugh. So there was the knife.

"Oh gods, Lucy!"

I had rammed it into my thigh as I fell. That also explained the wet feeling that was slowly making my pants soggy.

A wet hand touched my cheek and turned my head to the side so that I was looking into blue eyes. Oh wow, his eyes looked like the sea. I've never been to the sea, but I think that's what it looks like. The color also reminds me of the blue of the night, just before the sky turns orange. I smiled.

“Listen, Lucy. You have to stay awake now. "You're losing a lot of blood." His voice was calm, but I could swear it was shaking slightly. His thumb stroked light shapes across my cheek as I watched from the corner of my eye as Elijah leaned over my wound. Why did they want me? Help? I didn't understand. But that didn't matter. I was too tired for that.

I wanted to sleep because my eyes were getting heavier.

"Lucy! You have to stay awake! Do you hear me? Stay with me !" his voice pulled me back, just before I drifted off; the pain in my thigh increased and I hissed. My chest heaved, but someone gently pushed me back down.

"We will help you. I will help you. But you have to stay awake now, okay?" he gently, almost tenderly, stroked my cheek again. Why was he like that?

No! I didn't want his help. I shook my head vehemently.

"I-I don't want your help," I gasped.

"I just want it to stop! Please make it stop," I pleaded. Why was I still here? I was so tired, but also so angry.

The darkness became more and more oppressive. "Why, Lucy?" I turned my head back to Cassian. I put my hand on his. Held her tightly to my cheek so I wouldn't die all alone.

"I'm tired," it was no more than a whisper. That was the truth. I will sleep now. Because I was no longer able to keep my songs open.

" No! Do you hear me? Stay here!" someone shook my shoulders.

"The ambulance is right here," I heard a female voice say before the darkness enveloped me.

"Lucy!"

________________________

I wasn't dreaming. It was just quiet. This is how I imagined being dead. But I wasn't dead because I still felt that pain. I heard the voices and saw the light behind the songs. It was just like sleeping. And sleeping meant waking up. But I couldn't. Because waking up meant living and living meant acting and acting led to thinking and I didn't want to think anymore.

What had happened? Why did everything happen? Had I escaped? Had they brought me back? Would they torture me now? Why did they help me? What do you want to do with me now? So many questions were swirling in my head, giving me even more of a headache.

"You should maybe put on something fresh, take a shower, get some sleep," suggested a woman. Rey. So I hadn't escaped. Footsteps paced up and down the room. "No, I can't."

Someone sighed. "Cassian! It was a stab in the thigh! You heard the doctor. She lost a lot of blood and a concussion, but she will survive! You should take care of yourself now. You're covered in blood!", she counted on.

"She wanted to kill herself, Rey! Why did she want to kill herself ?!" he shouted angrily. It was Cassian and he sounded angry. It was quiet for a while. And then "You know it's not your fault?", silence again.

"Cassian! It's not your fault!"

" I scared her. I pushed her so far. I should have seen she wasn't just a little scared! She was... She's... Oh gods it's my fault!" someone growled.

"Don't you dare, Cassian. Stop it! It's not your fault. Weren't you listening? She thought we were going to kill her! That was an act of desperation! We have no idea what she went through. She was one Servant. With Lucien !"

Someone sighed.

"I hadn't imagined it all like that." Rey laughed uproariously.

"Oh no? What did you expect? That she would fall on your neck?" Silence.

"Yes?"

Someone snorted.

"Go wash now, you stink! I'll let you know immediately if there's anything new!"

"Okay, but-"

"Go!"

Then I disappeared into a deep sleep again.