The engine's humming came to an end when I turned it off and stepped out of the car, my backpack in tow. With my smile in place, I stepped into the building where I was schooling. I greeted everyone with a friendly smile and nod as I strolled to my locker. They all responded in the same way, some girls dropping comments on my outfit which I would reply with a short 'thank you' and a polite smile.

I saw my friends waiting for me in front of my locker. They were only three; Jarod, Melanie, and Layla. I had to stifle the heavy sigh that threatened to come out at the sight of them. There was nothing wrong with them. Despite being on the top popularity rank, they were cool with the rest of the students. That was why I hung out with them rather than Jasmine who was more stuck up than my Aunt Ophelia who lived in Malibu with a white picket fence around her lawn.

Jarod was popularly known as the school's gossip king. Nothing went on without him knowing about it. Simply put, no news passed him by. He must have some news for me with the way he was bouncing excitedly on his feet.

Melanie was a spoilt brat who walked on money but didn't flaunt it. Though there are times she could be a b***h.

Layla was the baby of the group. She was always quiet and agreed to most things said. She hated confrontation. You know, the usual.

Normally, I wouldn't mind putting on the mask of a loyal friend to Melanie's ranting about boy troubles, and excited gossiper to Jarod's news, and a kind and supportive friend to Layla's mathematics problem, but I was tired after this morning charade. It had drained me, mentally and emotionally.

But I had to. The show must go on. They mustn't find out, they could not find out. We were the perfect family of Bloomville and I was their perfect sixteen-year-old daughter who was loved by everyone, young and old. The show must simply go on.

"Hey, guys."

I greeted once I was within a foot distance, a huge smile on my face. Just like the people I had greeted in the hallway back, the response was almost automatic. They replied with identical smiles. For a minute, I wondered if they too were putting on a show like me but then I remembered that I was the only one with a family like the Del Lana's. The difference between their identical smile and mine was the authenticity of it.

"Thank God you are here Mona! Can you believe that Selena is going out with Davis Morgan? How is that possible? It is like a weird universe trick. The school slut going out with the famous teacher's pet."

Jarod said, his words matching the fast pace of his gesturing hands and fidgeting feet. He was excited, overly excited.

"Or maybe it's because she opened her legs for him, and the boy couldn't help but be hooked. Happens sometimes to me." Melanie piped in from behind, a somewhat bitter tone in her voice.

Maybe she had a thing for the Davis guy, but I couldn't care less. To avoid drama from Melanie, I ignored her and turned to Jarod. With an inward sigh, I gushed out.

"What? No way! That's so cute. It's like the alternative to the nerd and playboy romance that usually goes on around here."

I neatly arranged my books into my locker after typing in my passcode and took the ones I would use for my first class. After signaling I was done, we started to walk to our various classes.

"Hi, Mona."

"Hey, Mona."

"Looking good, Mona."

"Oh my gosh, I so love your outfit, Mona."

"That is top is so cute, Mona."

"How do you deal with so much attention Mona? It's so scary." Layla's soft voice stated as we passed people.

"She's already used to it. Monalisa Del Lana, the most popular girl in Bloomville. This girl is our very own celebrity."

Jarod beamed moving to hug Layla. I involuntarily winced at hearing my full name but covered it before they noticed and by they I meant Jarod and Layla. Melanie was busy on the phone with some boy.

"Don't worry,  I won't let them focus their hideous and terrible attention on you," he added, teasing her.

Like a huge ripe tomato, Layla's blush spread all over her cheeks as she swatted away Jarod's hand on her shoulder and ambled forward a little faster. Probably to escape Jarod and his embarrassing comments.

And so they continued as we sauntered down the hall, everyone complimenting us or rather me. After all, I was the most loved girl in school. I could do no wrong. The perfect friend, the perfect student, and the perfect school or classmate. Everybody loves Mona or rather, the mask she wore. I highly doubted people took a fancy to a broken thing which in this case was me.

I was happy over the fact that I didn't share the homeroom class with Melanie and Jarod. It was just me and Layla in Mr. Tobber's class. With a quick goodbye and promise to see each other in the cafeteria, I left for my homeroom class with Layla in tow.

We managed to arrive and find our seats before Mr. Tobber came in. I sat at the front row with Layla sitting beside me.

"Um...Mona?"

I heard a quiet voice beside me and turned to look at Layla who had her big blue eyes on me and her red curls tucked behind her freckled face.

I smiled in encouragement and it was a somewhat genuine one. I always felt more at ease with her than the rest of the group. Maybe it was her sweetness that drew me in or maybe it was the innocence I could see in her eyes. Innocence, which I had lost a long time ago along with my soul. I was nothing but a shell of my once self with puppet strings pulling from within.

"Do you have a spare pen? I forgot mine on my reading table back at home," she asked so quietly, I had to strain my ears to hear her.

"Sure,"  I said and handed her the spare pen I always carried with me. I heard her thank me and I absently nodded as Mr. Tobber stepped in the class at that moment.

"Hello class." he greeted, and we all responded in the same manner. He proceeded to take the attendance and then disclosed the result of the last pop quiz we had taken. He was also our literature teacher.

"And the person with the highest score for the quiz is Monalisa Del Lana," he announced.

I wasn't surprised by the news. I had always been at the top of every class. Even the teachers loved Mona. There was no room for flaws in my perfect act.

Despite how often this happened and by often I meant always, I faked the surprised expression on my face as Mr. Tobber and half of the class congratulated me while the rest grumbled and sulked quietly.

The other classes were uneventful and soon it was lunch. With Jarod and Layla in tow, we went to get our lunch. Melanie was already in the cafeteria.

Compared to other schools, my school cafeteria actually sold decent meals. Yeah, it may not be five-star five stars restaurant quality but it was enough to fill up our tummies tummy without us feeling like we were eating sandpaper.

Again like before, I went through many choruses of 'Hey Mona' before we finally reached our table. There were other people on the table who also welcomed us. They might consider me as their friend but I saw them as nothing more than acquaintances, acquaintances who were more of a kiss-up than Viola's minions.

Not feeling like holding a conversation with any of them, I ate my food quietly, a friendly smile on my face whenever my eyes met with any one of them.

"Hey, babe." I heard from behind me. Replacing my friendly smile with a fake full-blown one, I turned to the owner of the voice. It was Brian, Brian Frederick, my boyfriend.

Alas, what is a perfect girl without her perfect boyfriend? I could hear the chorused 'awwws' and the familiar smell of jealousy when I stood up to hug him.

Now, don't be fooled by Brian's boyish look and that charming easy smile. Just like me, he wore a mask but unlike me, the mask covered something far more sinister. He only revealed the true being hidden behind that mask to me.

Brian Frederick was an obsessive boyfriend that had the tendency of one day turning abusive. I hated him, with all my heart and being. I never for once liked him even when we were younger, but mother had felt like having the star baseball player and the handsome rich boyfriend was needed for my act. So, a love-stricken girlfriend was my role when with him.

"Hey, you,"  I replied. I quickly withdrew a little from the hug I was giving him when I smelt perfume on his shirt. It was faint and smelt of roses. Brian didn't use such fragrance. Looking closely at his shirt, I noticed a lipstick stain at the end of his collar.

That confirmed my suspicion; he was whoring around with another girl. Again.

I had nothing against him doing that seeing as our relationship was fake but sometimes, seeing him do something he would kill me before I could do the same pissed me off.

With a brief deep breathing control exercise and an inward sigh, I tucked the end which had the lipstick deep into his shirt and withdrew fully away from him. The big smile on my face was still in place. It mustn't and couldn't fall.

Brian, noticing what I just did, gave me one of his smiles that made girls excluding me swoon and pecked me on my lips. Sadly, it didn't have any effect on me. Perhaps if it did; it would be a lot easier to fake my relentless love for him as mother quite described it. All I got was an intense feeling to barf my guts out. I felt disgusted with him and myself, after all, I was in this mess too and I couldn't do anything about it.

"You're the best." He whispered in my ear.

The moment he sat down beside me, conversation resumed like it had never stopped. I watched quietly as everyone lived bits of their lives on that table. I couldn't even truly enjoy a conversation. This act was tiring. I wanted it to stop. I was tired but what could I do other than continue with this façade. And so, with a painful clench in my heart, Mona Del Lana put on a big smile and laughed with her friends.

Life had never been more perfect for her.

===================

I got back from school to a silent house. I wasn't surprised or alarmed; in fact, I was very much used to it. Either mother was sleeping, or she had gone to refill her stash of alcohol. it was impossible to meet father at home. By this time, he was either at the club partying with some strippers or f*cking his secretary or some unlucky whore in his bed.

Sometimes I wondered if he ever remembered the wife and daughter he had at home and then I remembered it was my father I was talking about. He just didn't care.

Closing the door behind me, I climbed the stairs and entered my room, locking the door behind me. I fell asleep the instant my head hit the pillow, not caring what was happening in the world around me. Just for a little while, I wanted peace. I was tired, so so tired.

I woke up to the sound of mother knocking and calling my name. I quickly went to open the door. There stood mother at the front of my door, her blonde hair neatly tied to a fancy bun, a gold evening dress with gold jewelry on her, and a brighter than bright smile.

I raised my eyebrows in question of her weird choice of attire.

"Why don't you come down dear? Dinner is ready. I made you and your father's favorite." She added with a smile. I was really in no mood for sitting with both of them throughout dinner, but mother must have seen my reluctance as her smile fell just enough to see the threat that laid behind that smile. I would seriously regret it if I didn't show up.

With a gulp, I nodded, and she beamed at me before going downstairs, a soft hum on her lips as she walked. I closed my door and started to get ready with a heavy sigh. Judging from her outfit, today's dinner was apparently formal.

I picked a short pink evening dress and pulled my hair into a ponytail, mother preferred them in dinners like this. Not really caring about my appearance, I walked down the stairs, a forlorn expression on my face. The dining area was unusually large for a family of three. It could easily fit a dozen people. The excess space just made the emptiness and coldness of the family even more noticeable and pronounced.

Father was on his usual seat with his phone in his hands, laughing at something he was watching. He looked up when I entered the room and took my usual seat beside him.

"Father." I greeted.

"Daughter," he replied.

That was our way of communication. As shameless as he was in his womanizing ways, he was still my father. His blood ran through my veins and no matter how much I hated that fact, I had no choice than to live through it.

Mother walked in at that moment, a steaming huge bowl of lasagna in her hands. I already knew it would be delicious, mother was an excellent cook and it was rarely messed up times like this I got to enjoy her amazing cooking skills.

Still humming the same happy tune of before, she dished out food and settled down. I immediately dug in, not wanting to anger her, and due to my grumbling tummy. My father unlike me was still hooked on what he was reading and so didn't notice the food in front of him.

I saw annoyance flicker in mother's eyes before she concealed completely with her beautiful smile.

"Abe, why don't you eat your food? It's getting cold," she said, her grip on her cutlery tightening with every word.

My father, Abel, after faintly hearing his name but not fully paying attention muttered words like "yeah, sure. Give me a sec".

Mother sighed deeply before turning her tired gaze to me. I stiffened, not expecting the sudden attention. At times I like this; I was tempted to feel pity for mother. No woman should have to put up with a cheating husband and one who had no shame doing it. It was maddening. But then, I would always remember how she dealt with her pain, drinking her wits out and blaming her failing marriage on me, poor innocent me. I felt nothing but disgust for the woman sitting opposite me.

"How was school?" she asked looking at me. I shrugged and played with my food, my appetite slowing vanishing.

"It was good. I was the top of my class in all of the quizzes we took on Monday and I have been invited to the BlockFester party for this year along with Brian."

The BlockFester party was one of the biggest teenage parties for this town and it was strictly by invitation. To be invited, you had to be “someone” and obviously I and Brian fell under that category seeing as they chose to invite us.

Mother grinned so widely, it started becoming creepy.

"That's wonderful Monalisa, well done. I can now boast to Mrs. Lindsey about my daughter being invited to that party. Now, be careful darling, don't get distracted enough for your grades to drop. You must maintain a balance between your academic duties and your social life." She said happily.

I nodded absently. I hated my full name with a passion. She always made it sound like an endearment for a toy, made me feel like an object in her possession.

Other parents would be happy genuinely for their child's success and congratulate them wholeheartedly. What was mine doing? One was busying imagining how responsible she would look among her friends and how she would be envied for having such a perfect daughter while the other could care less if I failed or passed.

Sometimes I wondered what mother's reaction would be if she found out the kind of person her beloved Brian was. Although I had a strong suspicion she already knew but decided to ignore. I wouldn't be surprised if that was the case. Carmen Del Lana was never one for sentiments especially if it involved her daughter. The only reason she would intervene was if it affected her personally or the perfect family image she had built up. That was all she really cared about.

Immediately losing the last of my appetite, I reached for the glass of water before me and took a slow sip. Mother turned to father to ask him what he thought about my excellent performance in school and my blooming social life. It turned out; he hadn't heard a single word. He was so occupied in the person he was chatting to and judging from the sly smile on his face, it was one of his whores. Mother was beyond livid at that point.

"What is wrong with you, Abe? Why can't you put that phone away, we are having a family dinner. You should be happy you are in a family dinner, damn it!" she snapped.

Father looked at her coolly and went back to his phone.

"You are the one who wanted us to sit here like a bunch of happy people when you know very well we aren't. In case you haven't noticed, no one wants to be here so get your head out of the clouds, Carmen, and stop trying so hard!" Father said and stood up.

He was right. On so many occasions had mother tried to live out our lies. It never worked because you can't treat something broken like it is whole. It falls apart completely. The dinner was already turning to a disaster and so I quietly stood up and made way to my room.

I was stopped by the loud sound of plates crashing and breaking. My breath hitched when I turned to see mother had thrown all the cutlery and plates to the ground. Her hours of hard work laid on the ground in broken pieces and splashes of sauce and pasta. It was a frightening sight.

Father turned also to look at her but while I had a terrified gaze on, father looked at mother with indifference.

"What are you doing, Carmen?"

Mother was standing amidst the mess she had made, her eyes livid, lips quivering, and angry tears rushing down her face like a waterfall. She turned those angry eyes that were once fixed on the chair father was sitting on before he stood on him.

"I have tried my best to make this family better. To make us seem happy, be happy but you have never for once appreciated my effort. It is either you are whoring around with Martha or Ally or whichever is prostitute out there. You make me sick!

We could have been happy if you just stopped for once to think about us, but you don't, you selfish man. I am always the one cleaning your mess and saving your sorry ass. I am the one, I. Why don't you show some gratitude?"

She yelled, gesturing wildly. She looked like a madwoman. It was not like she had much of her sanity, to begin with.

"Don't you dare put all the blame on me, Carmen! Tell me, why do you think I continue in my affairs, the pleasure I get from watching you fall apart excluded? Maybe I'm tired of you and want to be caught. Maybe I want to be far away from you and your sick definition of a perfect family. You have never for once made me happy and now I've found that with other women, you want to control my life like you are doing to our daughter?

"Oh, so you're saying I'm the one at fault?" Mother interrupted and scoffed bitterly but father ignored her.

"Well, I have news for you, Carmen. Your twisted idea of a perfect family is never going to work out. Do you know why? It's because this family is broken beyond repair and there is nothing you can do about it."

Mother swore angrily and with that, my father's long and quick strides took him far away from the dining table.

With a loud wail, mother dropped to the ground not caring about the broken dishes lying around her and cried. I stood there for a whole two minutes before my legs took me out of that scene and into my room.

The darkness of my room greeted me the moment I entered. My breaths came out quickened and ragged as I sped through my room to the closet not bothering to turn on the lights as I could see clearly from the bright moon shining down brightly in my room through the windows.

For the next few minutes, I turned crazed in my search. I turned my closet upside searching for that one thing that would give me respite from my harsh reality.

Finally, I found what I was looking for. With the bottle of whiskey, stolen from Mother's stash, firmly planted in my hand I put on my headphones and had a random song blasting in my ears.

I swayed my body in dizzying circles to the wild beat as I drowned away in my sorrow with the liquor. I was determined to ignore my crazy crying mother down the stairs and my father who had left his family behind to go and warm another woman's bed.

The moment the loud music finished, I dropped to the ground, the remaining liquid in the bottle splashing everywhere. The silence of the room was filled with my quiet sobs.

I was tired of everything; Mother's drama, father's nonchalant attitude, and my mask. I was growing weary of the act, it was eating me up from inside. I was dying inside, and no one knew because I wasn't allowed to express them. I wanted to live but at times like this, I would wonder if it was worth it. What purpose did I have in life? I was presently just a person living who Mona Del Lana should be but not who she wanted to be. I was lost and broken. I just wanted it to stop but I was too tired from the fight to carry on any longer.

I was withering away but mother and father were too bothered with their own problems to see. Did I have to end my life before I could escape this tiring charade? There was only so much a sixteen-year-old could take. When would my cup be so full that death would seem like a pleasant bed of roses? I also wanted to be a rebellious teenager doing the things I could only dream of. I so much wanted to be that badass heroine of a book or movie who no matter what came her way was ready to fight back and shake off her enemies but could I?

My sobs grew quieter and quieter as my throat became sore from all the quiet screams, from the pain of my fragile heartbreaking till eventually, I fell asleep on the cold hard floor of my room, the harsh smell of alcohol luring me to further sleep.