I'm equally amused...and perplexed by the moniker, which makes me think of a feisty, silver-haired widow with a taste for pearls and porn. "Aren't you talking about Lucia's mentor? Who is the one who is financially benefiting from her babysitter's erotica?

She certainly left an impact, didn't she?

I sneer, "That would be an understatement." But I'm still perplexed as to her connection to Mary.

"Alice is the one surprising Mary for her birthday."

"But there's a catch," I suppose. "Is there not?"

"After all, it is Alice. Additionally, in this instance, she hired a speed dating service to send thirty male prospects to the party, all of whom are...