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"My friend, drink up. You know how marriages can be. This life na once o. So enjoy while you still can."

"My wife has literally turned to a boring manipulating woman. Everyday I see her, I just want to leave the house. Just a simple thing and she's complaining. When I come to touch her, her words are «I'm tired». Can you imagine?" There was a clink of glass as the ice cubes floated above the Hennessy beer, then a gulp.

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I served the food on the dinning table and called upon Mama and sister Ogechi that the table was set. They came over immediately. Nebechi had already carried her food inside her room to eat and probably read, I knew. As for me, I left them to shower and change into my home clothes.

The shower pouring on me body made me froze, then I chuckled as it subsided, scraping my wet soap on my sponge and scrubbing my tired and sweaty body. The popular song of Fela Kuti rang inside my head and I didn't realize I was humming it. After showering, I wore my flowing gown with no bra as my breasts bounced at every step I took. I was hungry for food too. Ikekwere wasn't back from work then. I went to the kitchen to dish out my own food when I thought I heard Mama screaming like someone died. I rushed outside the kitchen in sheer confusion, staring at Mama's face at the dinning for an answer. Why was she screaming like that? Does she want to attract violent neighbors?

"Ngozi! What is this?" She pushed the bowl of soup savagely that some of the contents spilled on the table. Ogechi was glaring angrily at me while chewing on a meat.

"What happened, Mama? Why are you throwing the food away, it took my a lot of.... " Time to prepare the food, I almost cried my eyes out.

" Too prepare this junk, okwaya?" She berated, looking sternly at me then back at the food as if it was a piece of trash, "what sort of bad cooking is this?"

I stared hard at the half spilled egusi to find out the flaw but I found none. What is she even talking about?

"What do you mean my soup is bad?"

"Can't you cook good food? Why would you make this soup as thick as this and you didn't put at least four meats for me! Why making semo? I want fufu! Everything is wrong with this food."

" Mama.... Please.... "

" You can't prepare a single meal, what have you been feeding my son. I told him not to marry a witch like you! Now see! See!"

"Not Only are you lazy with your wifely duties, you go and come back as you like. before you married my brother, didn't you know how Mama likes her food? Have you come to make a mockery of us now?" Ogechi stated.

" I... "

" See? She has only cooked this trash to insult me."

" Mom. Stop making a mountain out of an ant hill. I can't pound fufu and you know... " Before I could continue, Mama wacked me across the face.

" You impudent and rude child! I'm older than your Mother!"

Nebchi had come out of her room to figure the commotion and I guessed she saw her Grandmother hit me. I spent few hours again, making a new vegetable soup as Mama ordered me and I had to send Nebechi on an errand to buy Fufu just a stone throw from our house to Miss Muojekwu, the food seller.

When everything was set, I served Mama her food and she checked it so as to see another flaw then snorted when she didn't and washed her hands to eat her food. "You shouldn't be reminded of everything. You are a woman and you suppose to know all these things."

I sighed then nodded with a wry smile. I was too tired. I wanted to go cool my head. I went into my room and fell on the bed. Immediately my head touched the cozy foam, I drifted off to sleep.

I woke up again from a violent jerk and saw Ogechi glaring at me. I was furious. Why would she come into my room and wake me just like that? I wanted to tell her, I don't like it when someone interrupts my sleep but Mama's action earlier disarmed me. I was still drowsy from sleep when I answered her, "Sister Ogechi... What is the matter?" Since I've got visitors, I should start locking my room. They could bang on the door for all I care.

"Is this how you run your house?"

"What... Do you mean?"

"Do you know what's time it is? Hasn't it dawned on you that you should cook?"

I stared behind her at the wall clock. 5:30 PM. I was agitated. I was angry. None of this would have happened if Mama and this woman beside me didn't come. This wouldn't have happened if Ogechi was accommodating that she decided upon herself to cook for the family and not wake me.

"Oh. You're still lying on the bed. Chere ka Mama bakwute gi ebeahu."

Groaning, I left the room, opening the door for her to leave. She glanced at me, her body resistant. I didn't want to talk to her. I just gestured that she should leave. After eyeing me, she reluctantly left. I shut the door and went to the kitchen to warm up the remaining food for my in-laws.

"Nebechi! Nebechi!"

"Mama o" She answered from inside her room then appeared beside me in matter of seconds.

"Please come and buy akpu for Mama and Sister Ogechi. Buy six rolls. I'm sure your father would like to eat vegetable soup when he comes back." I said, giving a N500 note." And please don't waste time because it's getting late. Don't talk to strangers. At least greet o."

" I've heard you, Mama."she took the money and dashed off while I continued with what I was doing. There came the rise of Ogechi's laughter subsiding Mama's. The TV static was running smoothly as actors' voices from the TV resonated the room. I hardly watched TV. No one watched TV unless the Twins came home. They would drag the remote control, competing for full control of the TV until my husband would come and snatch the remote control, then switch the cartoon channel to his favorite soccer channel. The twins would burst into tears and I had to suffer for it while Ikekwere would turn deaf ears to their cries as if he was listening to a defiant music. That was nostalgic.

Minutes later, Nebechi came in with a heavy nylon.

"Mummy, Miss Muojekwu said I should greet you on her behalf."

"Oh, She did? She did well."

" Where should I keep it?" She lifted the bag, searching vividly for a place to drop them.

"Just keep it here. I will warm later for eating."

"Ok." She kept it as I instructed. I expected her to dash off and leave me behind because she was supposed to study for their up coming exams the following week.

"What is it?"

"Nothing. It's just those stupid guys along Miss Muojekwu's shop." She replied with disdain.

" What's with them?"

" They're always behaving as if I'm their property. They are not even good-looking, yet they'll be promising me marriage up and down to get me. I hate these men. They have nothing good going on in their lives if not to chase girls up and down."

"Nebechi." She was 15. But already exposed to the matters of perverts at such a young age. I could remember vividly when she came to me, crying, too embarrassed to tell me that our neighbour, Mr Goodwill who rides keke groped her chests from behind. I angrily went to his house to confront him but his outburst made me slap him heavily. He tried to hit me back and I had to target his groin for defense. My husband came back home that day, embarrassed that I got into a fight with another man. He warned that I could have only shed a few tears for him to feel guilty, not act tough. I reminded him that it was our daughter that we were talking about. He berated me angrily for letting our daughter go outside to play with boys.

"If she didn't go out, None of this would have happened."

"You're talking like a coward, Ikekwere." I replied angrily. He just glanced at me while unbuttoning his work clothes, then took his home clothes and left me to sleep alone. I stared back at my daughter. She looked so much like her father. She was quite tall for her her age and with her dark skin, to me she is the most beautiful one. I could understand what she must be going through. It is only a matter of time before she start getting butterflies from these ungrateful guys. My Nebechi hardly go out because of that incident. It made her even more introverted and shy. But she tells me everything. That is a relationship between a mother and daughter.

"These guys have nothing in store for you. Don't even try to let them in no matter how sweet their tongues are. I did not ask you to curse them or insult them on their presence. Be polite but set your boundaries. Call for help if needed and do you have that pepper spray I gave you?"

" With me always. I never miss it."

" Very good." I nodded, scooping vegetable soup into two bowels as she watched me. "Do you want to eat rice?"

"Yes."

"I thought as much. You and rice. Do you know rice has more calories than any food?"

" But yet, I'm 15 and the calories haven't affected me yet. You, Aunty Ogechi, Papa and Mama nnukwu should be the one to worry because it also contains much sugar."

"This girl." I laughed, placing the soup bowls and plates of two fufu on separate trays. " Take these to the dinning and make sure you keep bottles of water and tumblers, okay?"

" Yes, Mama." She replied and carried the trays out. Then came for another after some minutes.

Just then, Ikekwere arrived and I heard Mama and Ogechi sharing pleasantries with their loud excited voices. It subsided when he approached the kitchen. He was standing there with a smile on his face, I had to pretend I didn't see him.

"You're not going to act like you don't see me. Aren't you going to give me your usual hug?"

" I'm not in the mood for hugs."

" And what's that suppose to mean?"

"I know you're not blind. I know you can see that I'm unhappy."

"Ngozi. Please not now. I'm not ready to argue." He replied in exasperation. I heard Nebechi signaling Mama and Ogechi that the table was set.

"I'm not in the mood to argue with anyone because I'm too tired. Please allow me." I took two trays of both our foods leaving him stranded in the kitchen.

He later joined us moments after he had showered. He washed his hands and began eating fufu with vegetable soup. He had a smile on his face as he glanced at Mama.

"Mama. How was your journey?"

"It was fine o. Nna o. Is this how Lagos people behaves?"

" What do you mean?"Ike asked, bemused

"We entered one commercial bus to your house. I was close to the conductor. He was spitting on my face the entire time." She said in the Igbo that my husband burst out in laughter. I had never seen him laugh like that. It was as if he was more comfortable with his mother than me. Her jokes wasn't funny to me at all. Nebechi was in her room as usual. I felt like an outcast in the midst of a tight family. I rushed up my food to leave them because they bored me.

Nebechi opened the door after I had knocked for countless times. She had a silly look on her face as soon as she saw me. I glanced at her room subconsciously to figure out her attitude. "What are you hiding? mmh? This one you're face is like this."

"Nothing. Nothing, Mama.."

"Have you been reading?"

"Definitely. It's only Maths that's my problem. Especially that anti logarithum and law of Algebra. It's so hard. God punish the person who invented Maths." She cursed. Coincidentally, Ikekwere and his family's laughter rose and fell with mine.

"Where are you having problems? Be thankful you've got a mother who knows maths."

"Is Maths a sibling to English?"

" I don't.... "

" Then why is Maths full of x and y. q and p as if we are solving a mystery case."

"You have a very wild imagination." I sighed. She giggled. My eyes caught on a fine written note by the side and opted to check it out. She was frozen and didn't try to stop me because she knew I would definitely find out. I flipped through the pages and saw it was a novel. An erotica. I glared at her. I knew she was a writer with no experience but with what I saw, I started questioning her innocence. "Nebechi, is this the exam you suppose to prepare for?"

"Mama." She drooped her head in apology.

" God."I paced around the room. It took me my hard work to pay her Waec fees and she had been writing about sex the whole time? "Nebechi, have you forgotten? You're repeating an exam. Your mates are already in Universities. Are you going to lock yourself forever, writing erotica? Even if you claim you're a good writer at least write good novels for publishing."

"I have good novels."

"Give them to me as soon as we are done with Maths." I sighed in exasperation. "come here, osiso."

She sat beside me, avoiding her head with the thought that I might knock her.

"Where is the four figure table booklet? Go and get it, osiso." My hands were itching to give a knock on her head.

" Yes. Mama."