I didn't have to wait long. Kat and Jess met two days later for happy hour. A happy hour that lasted for five hours. Kat, needing to get home to her husband, left it to Jess to debrief me on what had transpired. I figured if they had talked for that long, it had to be at least moderately good news.

Jess was cheerfully drunk when she got to my apartment. She wore a floral summer dress. It was too hot outside for anything else.

"How'd it go?" I asked, anxiously awaiting the report.

She threw herself into my arms and gave me a sloppy kiss.

"Fuck me first," she...