The month after Vegas leading up to Kat's wedding was a whirlwind. She was wrapped up in planning and events, and I threw myself into work rather than face any of the feelings that had grown in me during Vegas. It was easier to compartmentalize rather than ask myself -- or Kat -- why she was getting married. It was easier to compartmentalize than ask myself why I didn't want to think about these things. It was easier to be an emotionally stunted hedonist. At least, it was a hell of a lot more fun, anyway. Or so I thought at the time.

I had wanted to set up a...