Sydney

I hate me.

I hate my stupid brain.

I hate that stupid thing that usually kicks in; always craving that stupid sense of belonging.

I hate Chase.

I hate Dean.

I hate my body.

I miss my Dad…so much.

God, I could still remember that day back at Newston.

I remembered walking through the field, my head down, my stomach twisted from Chase apologizing for “mixing up” the pool party date.

It sounded strange in my ears because he wasn’t drunk when he texted me.

But me? As foolish and desperate as I was—waiting for the day I’d finally be invited to one of my boyfriend’s famous pool parties,...