Suddenly I realised I needed to be alone for a while. I needed to think. I had a huge, huge decision to make, and I didn't think I would be able to make it with a clear head if I stayed in this room, on this big soft bed, with these two cute naked boys.

I took a gulp of water.

"I think I'm going to go get some air," I told Ben and Pete. "Feel like stretching my legs."

"Sure thing," sighed Pete, stretching his arms as he relaxed back onto the pillows.

"Later then," grinned Ben, leaning in for a last kiss. I made out with him briefly,...