She responded with, "Yeah, and your asshole son-in-law passes this up every night, so I usually take things into my own hands if you know what I mean." Then she slapped her own ass.

I said, "ok, you're drunk, don't say anything else or you might regret it tomorrow."

She stepped into the pool, went down into the water up to her neck, she turned to me then said," You're right, I am drunk, but I know exactly what I'm saying. I told you in the car that I'm closer to you than anyone else on this planet, so if I want to tell you that I masturbate almost every...