The burial came faster than my heart could keep up with. It was only a day after her death. My stepdad said she had told him she wanted to be buried soon after her death. Learning that my mum had been preparing ahead of her own death had only made me cry deeper.

I stood there under the dull sky, dressed in black, sunglasses hiding eyes that were swollen and aching. Carol stood beside me, her arm around my back, steadying me when my legs forgot how to hold my weight.

The pastor spoke about heaven, rest and peace.

All I could think about was how my mother used to...