I wasn't happy when Deacon decided he was going to go and clean the bathroom like he said and I ended up following him, grabbing the back of his shirt so he couldn't get away. He ended up flipping the lid on the loo and making me sit on that while he used his clothes to mop up the worst of the water on the floor and then fetched the towels from the bedroom. He did that so fast that he was back before I had even realized that he had left and had a chance to follow him.

"Guess what I had to do this morning, Mr?" Deacon asked...