Chapter 113

I locked the door of my room. I don't want anyone else to come in because I want to be alone. I want to be alone and just cry all day. I don't want to go out. I do not want to eat. I am weak. My body and my heart are weakening, my whole being. I'm confused. I don’t know why it all led to this. If it's just a dream, I want to wake up. I don’t want to stay asleep if I keep moaning. But even if I slap myself, nothing still happens. I'm not dreaming. Not everything is a dream.

Neil really left me...