I covered my mouth after Randall came out. I keep my sobs from escaping because I don’t want him to hear me — hear me, that I am hurt. When I saw his back walk away from me, I didn’t know how to feel. I ask myself:

“Did I do the right thing?”

“Can I do it?”

“How is he?”

Even though my heart was stony because of what he did, I still felt like I couldn’t live without him. I want to pull him back and hug him. When my hand could no longer be restrained, I burst into tears. It’s fucking hurt. Can I just go to sleep...