I had been thinking about getting a fleshlight for weeks. It was one of those things I saw online, and it looked like it could feel really good. I was 22, living at home with my sister while I saved up for my own place. My sister, Emily, was out with friends most nights, so the house was usually quiet. I saved some cash from my part-time job at the warehouse and finally ordered one. It arrived in a plain box, which was good because I didn't want anyone asking questions.

I got home from work that Friday evening, my muscles sore from lifting boxes all day. The package was...