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Within two weeks, I relapsed and now I am back in the hospital. Doing chemotherapy and having a therapist come to deal with my anxiety. I know for a fact that if I am not careful this period I would end up with an anxiety disorder. Alyssa would certainly not want that for me. I can see it clearly in my head, if Alyssa was alive and something like this is happening, she would have hit me at the back of my head and order me to get my shit cleaned up. That is my girlfriend for you.... That was my girlfriend for you. I still can't believe that...