Don't I deserve it? In xiuhongmian's eyes, what am I? When I was a concubine, I was abandoned by him and became a general. Or I was despised by him. Was I a person who didn't count for anything in his eyes? Nothing, just a tool to use when needed?

I don't know why I care so much about my position in his mind. I don't want to think about it, or dare not. I know how it's going to end when I fall in love with someone I shouldn't. The only thing I'm glad about now is that at least I haven't fallen in love. Like doesn't mean love....